When we were learning about wargaming from The Germans - two German men who taught us wargames - they always say that you should not pay to reroll something unless the chance of you succeeding is at least sixty-six percent. I try to remember that every time; I can hear their voices in my head every time I forego their sensible advice. We offer another piece of advice to you today, a corollary of sorts, in today's incomparable strip.

I would rather be eaten in my front yard by wild dogs, but it's not to be. I'm heading over to Spokane where I will no doubt be eaten by something much worse.

Gabriel the Younger is quite a bit like his dad, but his youngest creature - like my own - simply can't be derived conceptually from a combination of their parents' traits. It's shocking to the layman, like multiplying two negatives and getting a positive. In practice, it's like entering the world with a service animal. There's just stuff about it I can't perceive despite my prodigious attempts and ample time to have done so. They see and delight in these hidden geometries! So it is that Noah often accompanies his father as an Adventure Companion, most recently to the Child's Play Charity dinner and auction. They did not secure the UCS Millenium Falcon (75192), but I think Noah would like you to know that he knew the designation and part number off the top of his head.

We had something called a "Bomb Cyclone" over here, which sounds bad, but it was okay! Well, it was okay if you live on what we call The West Side. On The East Side, something like a half a million homes had no power. It essentially turns your home into a freezing, freestanding Cave and it instituted a kind of extemporaneous "Return To Office" mandate but it was mostly just to charge people's phones. It made relatively normal things difficult, and it made difficult things impossible.

We've been saying that Game Pass is the platform for years; I let my sub lapse, but even on PC I was nominally an Xbox gamer for years. I don't know who is doing the curation on the PC side of things, though if I were doing it myself in some kind of Ambien soaked nocturnal fugue state it would be more or less the same slate. But their This Is An Xbox campaign, which we go into in the strip, kinda hurts.

Every crease and fold of the Concord saga is so confusing to me. After the response to the trailer, you'd think there might be a pause to reflect. After the performance of that beta, you'd think that would have pulled a comically large lever of some kind to take a breath. To hear Sony tell it, their process didn't involve "Gates" early enough, rounds of user testing or evaluation. The whole thing seems like it was greenlit by Vibes.

Channing Tatum is an incredible Gambit as long as you close your eyes. I can see a scenario where true innovators utilize forced perspective or something but there would be significant challenges. The suit looked uncomfortable; imagine that Channing Tatum were a squeezable product. This is what the tube would look like.

I loved Deadpool and Wolverine, especially the team of forgotten heroes they assembled. I leaned over to Noah in the theater and shook him shouting “BLADE” when Wesley Snipes appeared. While I liked seeing Gambit on screen and I appreciate that Channing Tatum likes the character, I have to say I don’t really see him as Gambit. He tried very hard and I don’t even hate the accent but he just doesn’t physically look like Gambit to me. If they want to get serious I think they need to hire someone like Austin Butler who I think would kill the role accent and all. 

About a week ago Eric Benson - known variably as Edge Benson, Azerbaijan, or The Notorious E.J.B. - dropped a shot of the League installer into the group chat. The reaction was as though he had shown us a venomous snake or a troubling X-Ray from his doctor. Has he been bamboozled by Arcane? We can't say it never happens.

I absolutely love the Arcane series on Netflix. It’s one of the most beautiful animated productions I’ve ever seen but they don’t just nail the art. It also has incredible music, great writing and killer voice performances. It’s the complete package and it’s so good at making me love the League of Legends universe that I get the twinge to reinstall after each episode. So far I have managed to avoid getting back into LOL. I’ve been down that road enough times that I know how it ends. Spoiler warning, it ends with me uninstalling the game in a fit of rage. 

I think R6 is probably a top five game for me, if not top three. The most common rejoinder I hear from people who washed out of it has to do with the sheer number of champions - I mean heroes, I mean Operators - you have to contend with. It's coming up on something like eighty, but they are divided into Attackers and Defenders and I think the asymmetry helps a lot. Also, I'm a dessicated and ancient genetic doldrum and I managed to get it. It's worth a couple nights and some time on YouTube to gain entrance to the Inner Sanctum - to play a dynamic, aggressive social deduction game masquerading as a shooter. It's simultaneously still kickin' and profoundly slept on.

So I just finished reading the Warhammer 40k book A Thousand Sons, and now I’m reading Prospero Burns. Like Jerry said in his post it would be hard to explain what these books are about if you are not already neck deep in 40K lore. Just know that Magnus was a good boy who was just trying to warn his Dad about something very bad that was going to happen, but instead he ended up making his Dad super mad. Like…SUPER mad. There is a saying in the community that “Magnus did nothing wrong” and while I am not sure if that’s entirely true (he did after all destroy the magical wards that protected holy Terra from the Warp), I do think he had good intentions. 

Warhammer 40k is both very, very cool, and very, very dumb - it is the very specific combination of positive and negative factors we refer to as "sweet." Destiny is kinda sweet, right? You're catching air on your jetbike in view of a passel of weird-ass moons, and even though you are an immortal space warrior you have a machine gun and a bunch of feathers poking out. In 40k, people fly around in huge churches that are so big there are people in the belly of them that think the outside world is a myth. They have Space Vikings and Space Vampires. Acquisitions Incorporated can hit some real drama precisely because it's incredbly goof troop for the majority of the runtime. Somehow, being silly in some ways - unabashed - allows Games Workshop's cadre of writers to pull out some gruesome gut punches. Magnus the Red falls in that category.

My life is just sort of nonsense, generally. For the last twenty six years or so there's always something bizarre happening that you might be able to project, but a few of them just don't make any sense at all. We started putting comics online because it seemed clear to us that nobody in their right mind would publish them physically, and it ended up being a whole thing. In 2003 we started a donation drive called Child's Play in the most aggressive way a charity has ever been started I think, and its modern incarnation is an entity that is at the forefront of using VR and AR as therapeutic tools - one that is about to release a certification process for technicians who merge technology and child life. It seemed like more people should be able to go to E3, but they couldn't, and so we made another thing and that one is still going - we're coming up on PAX Unplugged, and the three-day badges just sold out. We made a D&D Podcast before podcasts were super a thing, and it's entirely possible we started Actual Play accidentally. In fact, that's how I came to know the Secretary of State, Steve Hobbs: He's a fan of Acquisitions Incorporated, somehow…?

For some reason, both of our youngest wanted to watch Scream on Halloween separately. Even from the jump, it might not scare them, but there is a… cruelty in some of these older horror movies that must have been surprising even if it's not jump-scare scary. Scream in particular is a weird movie; not in a bad way, but it's doing some genre examination while it executes a strong premise. I'm sort of a horror fan, if the last couple sentences didn't give it away. Gabriel is, well, not.

Pokemon Pocket, Pokemon Trading Card Game Pocket, and Pokemon TCG Pocket are all the same game, so let the trainer within you breathe a sigh of relief. We have one suggestion that we think might improve things, but beyond that it's been a strong, even generous offering here at the start.